Saturday, April 23, 2005

In Appreciation of April 23rd;
William Shakespeare's Birthday

"Wherever the bright sun of heaven shall shine, his honour and greatness of his name shall be."

Shakespeare
Henry VIII, Act V, Scene IV


« هر آنجا که خورشید درخشان آسمان گسترد، شکوه و شرافت نام او خواهید درخشید»

Happy Birthday William Shakespeare!!

1 Comments:

I'm doubtful about Authoris'd too.Have to look it up in some dictionaries.

By Anonymous amirmehdi, at 1:08 PM  

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Friday, April 22, 2005

WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN
(AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)


To those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own,
grandchildren,
nieces,
nephews,
or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that
even God's omnipotence did not extend
to His own creatures.

After creating heaven and earth,
God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was
"DON'T!"

"Don't what?"
Adam replied.



"Don't eat the forbidden fruit."
God said.

"Forbidden fruit?
We have forbidden fruit?
Hey Eve. we have forbidden fruit!"



"No Way!"



"Yes way!"



"Do NOT eat the fruit! "
said God.



"Why?"



"Because I am your Creator and I said so! "

God replied,
wondering why He hadn't stopped
creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later,
God saw His creatures having an apple break
and He was ticked!

"Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit? "
God asked.



"Uh huh,"
Adam replied.



"Then why did you? "
said the God.



"I don't know,"
said Eve.



"She started it! "
Adam said.



"Did not! "



"Did too! "



"DID NOT! "

Having had it with the two of them,
God's punishment was that Adam and Eve
should have children of their own.

Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.


BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY!

If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,
don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children,
what makes you think it would be
a piece of cake for you?



THINGS TO THINK ABOUT!

1. You spend the first two years of their life
teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend
the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.



2. Grandchildren are God's reward
for not killing your own children.



3. Mothers of teens now know why
some animals eat their young.



4. Children seldom misquote you.

In fact,
they usually repeat word for word
what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children
more awful than your own.



6. We childproofed our homes,
but they are still getting in.





AND FINALLY:



IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION
AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS
ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:



"TAKE TWO ASPIRIN"
AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!


:D

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Tuesday, April 12, 2005

1 Comments:

رومانتیک شدی؟

By Anonymous amirmehdi, at 5:13 PM  

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Sunday, April 10, 2005

بعد از مدتها، یه فـــوتـبـــــال ِ حسابی دیدیم
Real Madrid - Barcelona
***********
p.s.
Today's fortune: (as told in orkut)
In God we trust; all others must pay cash.
:))

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Monday, April 04, 2005

Two nuns

There were two nuns...
One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL).
It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.
SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.
SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.
SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most? What can we do?
SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.
SM: It's not working.
SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.
SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.
SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both.
So the man decided to follow Sister Logical.
Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical.
Then Sister Logical arrives.
SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!
SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me.
SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?
SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.
SM: And?
SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.
SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.
SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?
SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.
SM: Oh, no! What happened then?
SL: Isn't it logical, Sister?
A nun with her dress up can run faster than man with his pants down.
And for those of you who thought it would be dirty, say two Hail Marys!

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